For many young people taking part in Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), the group skills sessions are a safe and predictable environment. They learn together, share experiences, and practise applying DBT skills to real life. Then comes a key moment in the Adolescent DBT programme — the Walking the Middle Path module — where parents or carers join the group for several weeks.
The involvement of family members is central to this module. It’s about building understanding, improving communication, and reducing the all-too-common polarised thinking that can appear in families under stress. But for some adolescents, the thought of having parents in “their” group can feel daunting. This is where the cope ahead skill comes in.
Why parents join for Walking the Middle Path
While the concept of Walking the Middle Path is taught throughout DBT – the module is unique to Adolescent DBT. It focuses on finding balance between acceptance and change in family life, understanding different perspectives, and avoiding the extremes of “all or nothing” thinking. When parents join the group, it allows everyone to learn the skills together — so they can speak the same language when problems arise at home.
However, the shift from a peer-only environment to one that includes family members changes the dynamic. For some adolescents, this might mean:
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Worry about being judged or misunderstood in front of their peers
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Concern that family disagreements will play out in the group
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Feeling they need to censor themselves
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Anxiety about how parents will respond to the content of sessions
The DBT team recognises these concerns as valid and predictable. That’s why a full session is dedicated to preparing for the change.
The cope ahead approach
In DBT, a cope ahead plan is a proactive strategy for dealing with an upcoming situation that might be challenging. It’s a way of imagining the event, identifying possible difficulties, and rehearsing skillful responses in advance.
The week before parents join, the adolescent group devotes their session to this. Together with the facilitators, they:
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Describe the situation clearly
The group talks about what will actually happen when parents join: how the room will be set up, what topics will be covered, and what the flow of the session will look like. This replaces vague worries with concrete information. -
Identify personal concerns
Each participant reflects on what specifically might be difficult for them. For one person, it might be speaking in front of both peers and parents. For another, it could be managing frustration if a parent says something that feels unfair. -
Choose effective DBT skills
The group reviews skills they already know — such as Wise Mind, DEAR MAN, Check the Facts, and STOP — and selects which ones will be most useful for their anticipated challenges. -
Rehearse skill use in detail
Cope ahead planning is not just “thinking about it”. Participants are encouraged to visualise the situation step-by-step, imagining themselves using the chosen skills in real time. This mental rehearsal strengthens the likelihood they’ll act skilfully on the day. -
Plan self-care before and after
Managing emotions is easier when we go in feeling balanced. The group discusses ways to regulate before the session — such as listening to music, breathing exercises, or grounding techniques — and self-soothing afterwards if needed.
Why this matters
Anticipation is a powerful emotional force. Without preparation, anxiety can build, and people are more likely to react impulsively. Cope ahead planning gives adolescents a sense of agency. Instead of passively waiting for a potentially stressful event, they actively prepare for it.
It also sets the tone for Walking the Middle Path itself. The module teaches that extremes — such as seeing a situation as “all bad” or “all good” — can be unhelpful. Cope ahead planning mirrors this principle: it acknowledges both the difficulties and the opportunities of having parents in the group, and encourages balanced, realistic thinking.
Tips for making the most of your cope ahead plan
While the facilitators guide the process, adolescents can make their plan more powerful by:
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Being honest about personal worries, even if they feel small or silly
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Writing it down to make the plan concrete and easy to review
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Including backup strategies in case the first skill isn’t enough on the day
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Practising out loud — for example, role-playing a DEAR MAN script with a peer
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Reviewing the plan with a therapist to get feedback and support
In the bigger picture
The cope ahead session before Walking the Middle Path is more than just preparation for one module. It’s a chance to practise a life skill: anticipating challenges and meeting them with a calm, intentional approach.
By the time parents join, adolescents have already visualised how they will respond to tricky moments. This not only reduces anxiety but also increases the likelihood that the group will run smoothly and constructively for everyone involved.
For families, this preparation can be the difference between a tense, defensive start and a collaborative, open-minded beginning to Walking the Middle Path.
DBT isn’t just about learning skills — it’s about applying them when it counts. The cope ahead plan before parents join the group is a prime example of using DBT in action, laying the groundwork for a balanced, respectful, and productive family experience.
For more information on
Dialectical Behaviour Therapy
Contact DBT-UK
info@dbt-uk.co.uk | +44 (0) 7541 458 851
